


Under the bad, bad moon tonight

by CoinToYourWitcher



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: A Ben Solo that smells like Old Spice and actual sea spray, Age Difference, All song fics all the time, Anorexia, Benji Lewis, Chivalry, Drinking, Drowning, Eventual Sex, F/M, Family Secrets, Forbidden Love, Hawaii, ITS NOT THE SAME WITHOUT THEM, Kauai, Kungs, Kygo - Freeform, Louis The Child, MØ, NoMBe, Plot Twists, Recreational Drug Use, Reylo - Freeform, Secrets, Sexual Tension, Sibling Rivalry, There's a special place in hell for people who don't listen to the song recs, Toxic boyfriend, Twins, Vegan Ben Solo, beach bonfires, odesza
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:01:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23114359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoinToYourWitcher/pseuds/CoinToYourWitcher
Summary: Rey is dating Kylo, who takes her to Hawaii to meet his twin brother, Ben.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo
Comments: 10
Kudos: 61
Collections: House Dadam





	1. Out by the ocean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **What did we find  
>  Out by the ocean  
> Feels right to me  
> Drift on, drift on  
> Don't want to rewind  
> Come all that may, I'll  
> Drift on, drift on**
> 
> Drift by Benji Lewis 
> 
> [The Spotify Playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/63yHnBdh2znWTsKafXqy3i?si=SohSnPULTRi5l62yQlOWrQ)

[ ](https://ibb.co/Zgq18n9)

It wasn’t lost on Rey that Kylo always put her in the middle seat on planes, or the fact that he used her as a second table to hold his drinks or laptop accessories. 

Feeling ungrateful, she looked back at the curtain that separated their area from business class, her seat twice as wide as her hips, with all the drinks she could want. 

Her modeling career could never afford such extravagance, and even if she could afford unlimited liquor, she couldn’t drink it. She was on a strict diet, monitored by Kylo himself. He had promised her a part in his next film, if she stayed a size 00.

Her stomach grumbled but Kylo didn’t hear it, asleep under his jacket next to her. A waste of a window seat. She had never seen Hawaii before and was dying to get an aerial view. They only had a few days here on Kauai, one of the less-populated islands. She had wanted to go for at least a week, but Kylo’s work schedule was hectic.

Kylo stretched his enormous limbs, the change in elevation slowly waking him up. He would have been very uncomfortable anywhere but first class, being 6’5”, with wide shoulders. Rey had always appreciated his body, in the way that a girl in high school might steal glances at the football captain, sometimes finding herself just staring at him with want, then he would make some comment and break the spell.

As the plane descended and she swallowed to pop her ears, Rey spotted a tiny bit of bright, green grass on the rocky coast, then nothing but runway. 

Sluggish from the xanny he took an hour ago, Kylo gave her a peck on the cheek as they filed out of the plane. He put on his sunglasses, muttering something about the humidity.

“Your brother is picking us up right?” Rey asked, as they waited for their bags at Lihue Airport. 

“Uh, yes,” he said, absentmindedly, catching up on his emails and texts on his phone.

Rey was excited to meet Kylo’s twin brother. From Kylo’s stories, he sounded like a character and in the year she’d been with Kylo she hadn’t met him once. Kylo rarely attended holiday gatherings.

Kylo spotted his bag and grabbed it, extending the handle, all skillfully without looking away from his phone. 

Rey saw her bag come down the chute, easily identifiable with the bandana she had tied to it. Chasing it a little in her wedges, she gripped the top handle, but someone grabbed it from the middle one, hoisting it easily over the edge for her.

“You must be Rey,” a voice said, sounding exactly like Kylo and yet nothing like him. He still held her bag, not letting her carry or roll it. He looked so much like Kylo that she almost laughed at the absurdity of it.

“Oh, wow, you’re Ben!” she said, probably too excitedly. He gave her a one-armed hug, gifting her a whiff of Old Spice and actual sea spray.

“Where’s Kylo?” Ben joked, five feet away from him as he texted, “Oh, well, she’s mine now,” he said, in an attempt to get Kylo to pay attention.

“I’m. Coming. You. Dick,” he said, finishing his sentence and trailing behind them. Rey noticed they weren’t on hugging terms, but at least there was some element of comradery.

Walking to his Jeep, Rey marveled at the differences and similarities between the two. Their haircuts were exactly the same and she probably would have confused them, were it not for a few distinguishing characteristics. Ben had a little chin stubble, a tan, and was wearing a white T, a color Rey had never seen in Kylo’s dark attire. 

Ben opened the passenger door for her, and she realized bitterly that she was not going to get them confused in the slightest.

When they got to Ben’s house, a beautiful all-wooden bungalow house on a jungle-y part of the coast, Rey almost squealed. It was Kylo’s first time seeing Ben’s house as well and he gave them the tour, pointing out their bedroom, which had its own big bathroom and furnishings. 

“How can you afford this place?” Kylo asked, peeking out the back porch at the hot tub.

“Come on, I’ve told you what I do,” Ben said, opening the fridge to show them the fully-stocked shelves. On cue, Rey’s empty stomach bubbled again.

“You’re not exactly pulling in six figures,” Kylo said, goading him. He did this a lot when he was threatened, the money dick measuring.

“I flip houses,” Ben said to Rey, “And no, I am not a mega movie producer, thank you, Kylo, we all know you’re the successful, ambitious one.” He smiled but he looked a little less proud of his amazing home than he did a minute ago. 

Rey lowered her head, ashamed of Kylo.

“Holy fuck,” Kylo said, jumping as a rooster walked into the house from the open kitchen door. 

Rey had seen at least fifty wild chickens on their ride from the airport, descendants from the early settlers, now living free on the island with quite a host of pigs too, apparently.

“That is Chewy,” Ben smiled, tossing a grape onto the floor for him. Rey laughed as Chewy tottered after it. “He’s wild, but he’s a beggar.”

“Did you name him Chewy because you’re going to eat him?” Kylo quipped.

“No, he sounds like Chewbacca when he crows, all the neighbors call him that. Who wants to go to the beach?” Ben said, looking at Rey.

“God, give me about a two hour nap and I’ll be ready,” Kylo said, heading for the bedroom. 

“Can I go?” Rey asked Kylo. He was always in a better mood if she asked permission, like a child. 

“Knock yourself out,” he said, closing the door. 

“Do you need to change?” Ben said, unphased by his brother’s absence. 

“I’ve been wearing my suit for seven hours,” Rey admitted.

“Oh, you’re _prepared_ ,” he said, grabbing the entire fruit bowl and leading the way, letting Chewy have run of the house.

\---------------

Rey was surprised by how rough the waves looked. She was rethinking her string bikini, under her sundress. They were standing in the shade under the trees, right next to the footpath that led to Ben’s house. She stepped out of her wedges, feeling the fine sand between her toes.

Rey could see the steep, lush mountains that the island was known for, spiking up from the sliver of white beach on the coast. The water was cerulean blue to mirror the sky. It was paradise.

Ben pulled his shirt off, and started unbuttoning the crotch of his jeans. She bit her lip, noticing his “man V” was way more pronounced than Kylo’s. How awkward to spend time with someone who looks exactly like your sexual partner, as if they already knew you were attracted to them.

There were a few surfers, but the beach was empty, so--apart from Ben-- Rey didn’t feel self conscious. Sliding out of her blue beach dress, she let it puddle at her feet, then picked it up to add it to the tree where Ben’s clothes were hanging. 

Ben facetiously looked at her in her simple red swimsuit, then spun his face to the tree, groaning, as if trying to restrain himself. Rey smiled, feeling pleased, but she knew Kylo wouldn’t like this type of joke if he was here. He probably wouldn’t have flirted if Kylo were here, though.

They walked into the waves up to her hips, when Ben grabbed her hand.

“Okay, time to dive,” he said, seeing a big wave coming. Rey watched it, hoping she could just jump it, but he was right, it was going to pummel her. Taking a big breath, she leapt into the wave with Ben, feeling it pulling on her from her hair, down her body, then finally, swirling around her feet as her head breached the surface, one foot finding the seafloor. 

Ben was laughing, his back turned to her. Looking down, she realized her top was completely gone. Like, the ocean ate it. Ducking down into the water, she blushed furiously, mortified.

“Welcome to Kauai,” Ben said, shaking his head, peeking over his shoulder to make sure she wasn’t still standing. 

“What do I do? It’s gone!” Rey laughed, looking around at the clear water.

Ben was tipping back and forth, _maybe he found her top with his feet_? He stood up straight, pulling his swim trunks out of the water. Rey opened her mouth in shock. 

“We’re even now,” he smiled, proud of his idea, flinging his shorts towards the shore. 

Rey laughed into her hands, trying not to look below his waist through the transparent water.

“I’ll look if you look,” he said, peevishly.

She punched him in the arm, “No! Oh my God!” Rey laughed, her face beginning to hurt from all the smiling. Ben was a total flirt, but it was _completely charming_.

“Let’s swim,” he said, going out further. She followed, getting the occasional blurry siting of his tan butt. 

After a few minutes, she started to feel tired, a side effect of anorexia, but she pushed on, not wanting to seem unathletic. After another minute, thinking realistically, she stopped, looking back to shore, measuring the distance, the empty light turning on in her fuel tank. She was starting to have a hard time combating the waves and she swallowed a little bit of salty water. It felt like she’d swallowed a rock, weighing her down. 

Ben was still swimming. Her eyes wide, she went under a few inches, the salt burning. 

Rey sputtered, trying to tell Ben to come back. She was going to need his help. 

Inhaling accidentally through her nose this time, she convulsed, feeling a burn where she never wanted to feel water. She started panicking. 

Ben’s big arm swooped over her chest, leaning her back so her face was upright, the back of her head leaning on his shoulder. She took a deep gurgling breath.

“I’m sorry!” she choked, warm ocean water leaking out the corners of her mouth and spraying in the air.

“Why are you apologizing?” he asked, pulling her towards shore. His right arm was overlapping her breast, but he didn’t seem aware. She let her body drift under his pull, looking at the blue sky, trying to suppress her coughs, worried they would annoy him.

He pulled her arm over his shoulder, hunching over to help her walk, like she was a wounded soldier. She covered herself with her other arm and kept her head turned away from his nakedness. He was making no attempt to cover himself, one arm holding hers in place over his neck, the other steadying her around her back. Somewhere far behind them in the water, they heard the surfers whistling. 

Ben led her up the beach and wrapped her in her towel. She was still coughing but watched as he spun a towel around his waist, curiosity finally getting the better of her.

She started cough-laughing, in shock.

Ben smiled, patting her on the back to speed up her speech abilities, “What?”

She shook her head. She did not want to voice that thought aloud.

“What?” he laughed, insisting.

“You’re even bigger than Kylo,” she said, giggling, meaning the glimpse she got of his dick.

“Yeah, I am!” he laughed, tightening his towel, “Fuck you, Kylo!” he shouted with his head pointed towards the house. Kylo wouldn’t be able to hear from this distance.

Rey was so caught up in the last few minutes, it was as if she had forgotten Kylo existed. It felt like she had been with him, only a better version. Like a fresh start. She knew everything that had happened in her one hour with Ben would infuriate him. Kylo was very possessive, even as he disregarded her most of the time.

They started walking back to the house, her cough finally dissipating. 

“Do you need mouth to mouth? It’s not too late,” Ben said, hopefully.


	2. And we’re not made of stone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Show yourself  
>  There's nobody else  
> Strip the layers away  
> Oh let me unfold your love  
> There's a fire below  
> And we're not made of stone  
> Got me melting away  
> Every time when our bodies touch  
> I'm tripping like, oh oh  
> I'm tripping like, oh  
> I'm tripping like, oh oh  
> You know, you know**
> 
> Tripping Off - Kungs, Lune

“You got a lot of freckles from yesterday,” Kylo said, squeezing her hand as he drove down the highway past a green wall of grapevine-covered trees.

She hadn’t told him about her near drowning or toplessness, or  _ anything else _ from yesterday. 

He wasn’t exactly observant. She had come back to the room in a towel and changed into clothes and he hadn’t looked up to discover she had lost half her bathing suit. 

Kylo used to watch her when she changed in the same room as him, but now it was as if she was just brushing her teeth or something. His spark for her was fading. She often wondered if he kept her around because she was so well-trained and passed as arm candy for events.

They had borrowed Ben’s Jeep to go for a hike. A very strenuous hike. Her legs were Jell-O after the steep incline and she had mud all up her calves. 

Rey was so hungry she wanted to scream. When they got to the house, she was definitely going to eat something.

Looking out at the water as they drove back to Ben’s, Rey replayed their conversation with him this morning.

“I know the perfect spot for a hike, it’s shady the whole time and it's got a great view of Hanalei Bay,” Ben had said, filling up his Camelbak at the sink. He started packing his bag with GoMacro Bars, bananas, and little Uncrustables sandwiches. She smiled, thinking of eating a snack at the top.

“Oh, are you coming?” Kylo said, coming out of the bedroom in nothing but a pair of polyester basketball shorts, rubbing the back of his wet hair with a towel.

“Kylo,” Rey said, angrily. They had all discussed a hike last night.

Kylo slid forward, wrapping his arms around her waist.

“I just want to spend the day with my girl,” Kylo said, attempting to sound appeasing. He only ever did this when he was showing her off, like a trophy. Normally it felt good to be admired, but this time it felt contrived.

Ben started unpacking his bag, his face impassive, “No, I’ve done that hike so many times, you guys have fun.”

When they got back to the house, it was filled with a savory smell. Ben had grilled pineapples and peppers, and roasted cauliflower and mushrooms over the grill in tin foil. He had laid it all out on a bed of rice with some kind of mango-y drizzle on top. Rey could have kissed him. 

“Where’s that rooster? I need some meat,” Kylo scoffed, sliding his chair up to the table. He was jealous again, watching Rey to make sure she sat next to him.

“I don’t eat animals anymore,” Ben said, woodenly, “For about two years now. You’d know that if you came to Christmas.”

Rey smiled at the heaping plate Ben handed her, then balked at the look Kylo was giving her. That You’ll-Never-Make-It-In-Hollywood-Look he does.

“Oh my God, it tastes even better than it looks,” Rey said, after her first swallow, ignoring his disapproving eyebrows. Kylo looked like he wanted to knock her plate off the table.

“Thanks! Everything is expensive because it has to be imported, so it’s cheaper to just learn how to cook on a budget,” Ben said, grinning as he set a plate down in front of himself last.

Rey sighed happily as her hunger pains were replaced by a full stomach and despite his complaints, Kylo ate two plates. He was always nicer after he ate.

Rey was using a wet paper towel to rub some mud off her legs, blushing as she saw both men watching her from the table as they talked. 

She wanted to go watch the sunset on the beach, but found herself wishing Ben would come with her rather than Kylo. She tried to think of a way to create that scenario when Kylo stood up.

“I’ve got some work to do, you guys can watch a movie or something,” he said, heading to the bedroom. Rey walked closer, as if she was going to insist he hang with them, but found herself just leaning on the back of one of the kitchen chairs, looking at Ben as if their babysitter just fell asleep.

Ben glanced at Rey and without warning, slammed his hand flat on the table, sliding something over to her, as if it were a challenge.

Rey took the small wrapped candy, holding it up, “dessert?” she guessed.

Ben grinned, leaning back to look at her under his loose hair.

————————-

“I feel like I can feel gravity in my blood,” Rey said as they laid like logs on the beach, looking at the stars. There was no light pollution, like in LA. No smog. There was just the moon, the stars, the sound of the waves, and the feeling that if she looked too hard, she was going to fall into space.

“Have you really never done a gummy?” Ben asked, positioning his hands behind his head as a makeshift pillow. Rey glanced at his thick abs, where his shirt had lifted a little bit.

“No, I’m always afraid to do anything that lowers my inhibitions at parties, even drinking. I mean, I drank in college, before I had to drop out, it was so expensive. But it doesn’t feel that safe anymore, at LA parties with so many strangers. Anyway, that’s how I met Kylo. We were the only two not drinking at a party,” Rey said, remembering.

“He’s sober now?” Ben asked, seriously. Clearly Ben was familiar with “former Kylo,” back when he used to binge drink and black out. It was before they met, but anytime someone asked about the little scar on his eyebrow, Kylo would have to share the story about driving drunk and turning a guardrail into a corkscrew.

“Yep, almost 400 days,” Rey said, proud of that at least.

“He didn’t tell me,” Ben said, feeling the loss of connection with his brother.

Ben handed her the Hydro Flask bottle of water they were sharing. The gummies came with an unquenchable thirst. Sipping it, Rey giggled. 

“What?” Ben smiled.

“I have to pee. But I don’t want to go back to the house,” Rey said, unmoving.

“Why don’t you want to go to the house?” Ben asked. It was only a two minute walk.

“Because  _ Kylo _ is there,” Rey said, indicating she wasn’t in the mood for him.

Ben stretched his back, not looking at her, before suggesting, “Then just go in the bushes.”

“Can I?” Rey asked, seriously, getting up.

“Stop asking for permission,” Ben laughed.

“Sorry,” Rey giggled again. She could hear herself giggling and she worried she sounded like she was pretending to be high. Every other time she’d been stoned she also got very introspective, like her normal self consciousness blossomed into full on conversations in her head about her own behavior.  _ Stop thinking, stop giggling, _ she told herself.

“And stop apologizing,” Ben shouted as she walked into the trees, finding a secluded spot and pulling her jean shorts and panties down. She hadn’t peed outside since she went camping in high school. As she peed, she wondered if Ben knew he was ten years older than her, if Kylo had mentioned that.

Thinking to ease the awkwardness of the situation, Ben looked at the moon, “Full moon tomorrow. They have this beach party every full moon, not far away, if you want to go tomorrow, I can take you guys,” Ben said. 

Rey recognized a test when she heard it. If he had wanted her and Kylo to come, he wouldn’t have asked just her, right after a comment about avoiding him. She drip-dried, not trusting any of the plant life as toilet paper, and came back out, collapsing back in the cold sand, closer to Ben than before she got up.

“How about you just take me?” she said, rolling on her back again.

“We could do that,” Ben said, smiling ear to ear and laying down next to her. “Are you going to remember this tomorrow?”

“It’s just THC, it’s not a gallon of vodka,” Rey said, digging her feet into the cold sand. “It feels like...my whole body is vibrating,” she observed, holding very still.

“God, you’re cute,” Ben said, attempting to sound offhand. Rey smiled, burying one foot with the other.

“You know what I crave when I eat these?” Ben said excitedly, sitting up.

“What?” Rey asked, sitting up too.  _ More food! How could she be hungry again? Oh, the munchies. _

“Butter sandwiches,” he laughed, “it’s just folded toast, but I’m going to make it a thing!”

Rey laughed with him.

“God, you’re cute,” she said, parroting him. His flirtation was contagious. Apparently when she was high she just gave into it, no filter.

“You know what’s cute?” Ben said leaning towards her, serious now.

“What?” Rey asked, breathless, looking at his mouth.

“That little crab under your leg,” he said, pointing.

Sure enough, there was a mouse-sized crab skittering away from his finger.

Screaming, Rey jumped up, unable to find the crab again in the dim moonlight. Ben scooped her up, princess carrying her back towards the house.

“Don’t worry, I won’t let them nibble you to death. It’s a slow, painful death, you should be so glad I was there,” he joked.

And yet, she  _ was _ glad.


	3. Ain’t no surprise that I can’t sleep tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Ain't no surprise  
>  That I can't sleep tonight  
> My only vice  
> Is standing by your side  
> So won't you love me better  
> I'm waiting here  
> I need you now  
> Gravity can't hold us down  
> So just take me there  
> To higher ground**
> 
> Higher Ground (feat. Naomi Wild) by ODESZA, Naomi Wild)

Ben set her down barefooted on the deck as they shushed each other, creeping in through the sliding glass door, giggling too loud. They froze, seeing Kylo at the kitchen table, a beer in hand.

“Kylo? Are you _drinking_?” Rey asked, stepping away from Ben a little. There were three empties on the table already. He wasn’t looking at her though, his eyes were boring into Ben.

“Found these,” Kylo said, flicking their empty gummy wrappers onto the table.

“It’s just 10 miligrams,” Ben said, turning a lamp on so they weren’t standing in the dark.

“Yeah, did you ask me if you could drug my girlfriend and take her off to fuck her on the beach?” Kylo said bluntly, sipping his beer.

“What?!” Rey cried, “We’re in Hawaii! We just sat on the beach!” she said, trying not to mention the sunset, lying down, or how much fun it was, anything that would set him off further.

Ben started clearing away the empty bottles, putting them in recycling, not saying a word.

“Ben? Did you just _sit on the beach_?” Kylo asked, mimicking Rey in an unflattering tone.

“Yeah, we just sat on the beach,” Ben said, washing his hands in the sink, “And don’t talk to her like that in my house.”

Kylo stood up, looking at Rey, “Can I talk to you outside?” It wasn’t a request.

Rey obeyed, following him through the living room. 

Ben stretched out, putting one hand on her arm when Kylo wasn’t looking, as if asking her to stay inside. She kept walking, afraid Kylo would see, and stepped outside. She followed him down the steps and onto the sidewalk.

Kylo seemed very unsteady on his feet to be only on his fourth beer. He glanced at Ben over her shoulder, watching from a window, then Kylo pulled her in for a one-armed kiss. 

She was expecting a fight, more accusations, not his jealous tactics. He was so strong--apparently--when he drank, like a vise, his beer-tasting tongue invading her mouth. She squirmed as he leaned too far towards her, waiting for him to make whatever point he was trying to make, her hands held out, not encouraging him. He stumbled forward, then was thrown back, as Ben pushed him off of her.

They looked like they were going to fight, then Ben whispered something to Kylo, trying to calm him down. Unsure of what to do, Rey wiped her mouth off and folded her arms. Kylo handed Ben his half-finished beer, his jaw working the way it did when he was embarrassed. 

To Rey’s surprise, they all walked quietly back inside. Ben handed Kylo a glass of water from the sink and he took it, walking to the bedroom and closing the door quietly. 

“What did you say to him?” Rey asked, amazed at his sudden turn around.

“I don’t think I should be the one to tell you,” Ben said, looking down at the counter.

Rey didn’t want to ask Kylo, but he seemed calmer now, so she headed for the bedroom too, opening it up. Kylo was sitting on the end of the bed, his head in his hands. She kneeled in front of him.

“What did Ben say to you?” Rey asked quietly.

Kylo wiped his nose.

“He said, ‘Dad wouldn’t want to see me like this,’” Kylo said, looking up at her, “I haven’t told you about our dad.”

“What about him?” Rey asked, trying to ignore the floaty feeling she still had in her head and focus. This seemed important to the two of them.

“I told you about getting this scar,” he said, pointing to his eyebrow, “in a car crash.” He took a gulp of his water. “I left off the part where my dad was in the car with me. I left off the part where I killed my dad. I left off the part where I went to prison for a year for involuntary manslaughter. Then I drank nonstop for two years. Then I quit and met you.”

Rey swallowed, thinking. _Wasn’t that a felony? Was Kylo a felon?_

He was looking at her expectantly, _waiting to see if she was, what? Going to leave him?_

She had the power. It went back and forth sometimes. Usually he had it, but sometimes she had the power when he had done something really bad. Like the time she caught him cheating. 

Fighting the calming effects of the drug, Rey reminded herself that this was big. Kylo hadn’t even told her that he had died, he still talked about his dad as if he were alive, living in Oregon with his mom. He hadn’t mentioned a _year_ in prison. 

Her mouth felt dry again. She stood up and went out the bedroom door, grabbing the Hydro Flask off the table. She pulled open the sliding glass door and started walking towards the beach, taking a swig.

  
She heard someone following her, probably Kylo, coming to gravel, or Ben, to check on her, but she kept an eye on the trail, avoiding frogs and giant snails everywhere.  
  


She was almost to the beach when he stopped her, his hand on her arm. She saw a flash of white T-shirt and knew it was Ben, before he was kissing her. Backing her into a tree, he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her hips to his. She let him inside her mouth. Her hands tangled in his hair, her arms raised awkwardly high by his broad shoulders, even as he hunched over her.

  
She had never pulled on Kylo’s hair, he probably wouldn’t like it. Ben sure did though, grinding into her to the point where her feet left the ground for a second. She was starting to see stars because kissing him was more important than getting enough oxygen.

_You should not be kissing him right now,_ she thought. _Why is he kissing you right now? Does he think you just left Kylo? Did you just leave Kylo?_

Rey thought of Kylo sitting alone on his bed while she made out with his brother. This felt low. She pushed Ben off, and he relented, looking worried, as if he had misread the situation or offended her, maybe taken it too far.

He didn’t say anything, just stared at her, catching his breath, with his big, wet bottom lip that was begging for her to continue kissing him.

Rey ran back to the house, before she did something she would regret, and went to the bathroom next to the living room. No Man’s Land. She locked the door.

The image of Ben’s bottom lip flashed in her mind. His white, three button T-shirt stretched over his pecs. His hands on her waist. 

Rey turned the tub’s faucet on, not to take a bath, but for the noise. She laid down on her back on the floor of the bathroom and pulled her shorts and panties off. Her middle finger pressed hard on her clit, sliding up and down, slick, where Ben’s kiss had affected her. 

Ben’s arms around her waist. Ben pushing Kylo off of her. Ben carrying her. Ben’s huge dick right before he covered it with a towel. Her hips bucked, thinking about his crotch against hers, the tree at her back. 

Her body was unsatiated by her fingers. She closed her eyes and pictured Ben’s hand on her, going inside her. The tub was overflowing, but she wasn’t there yet. Ben’s arm on her breast while she floated, staring at the sky. “Ah!” she cried into her elbow, finally feeling her body wracked with a sweet spasm. 

One breath and she was back to reality, spinning around and turning off the faucet, on her hands and knees in a puddle of water. She unplugged the drain and grabbed a towel for the floor. 

Her body still wasn’t appeased, and she knew it wouldn’t be until she had him. 

She had a version of him in the bedroom. He looked exactly the same. _How could one hold so much attraction and the other repulse her now?_

Still on her knees, she stuck her head in the cold tub water, trying to sober herself before the THC and her hormones had her running to Ben’s bedroom door. Coming up for air, she wrung her hair out and made herself a blanket out of another towel, curling up to fit on the fuzzy, white bath mat.


	4. I want to get away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **I want to get away  
>  Please say that you want to  
> The places we could go are all posh and green  
> I'll pay for the gas  
> We'll head for the hills  
> And it could be amazing**
> 
> Young Hearts - NoMBe

The next morning, Rey came out of her hiding place when she heard someone in the kitchen. Turning off the light and closing the door, she saw Ben staring at her from the stove.

“Did. Did you sleep in there?” he asked quietly. There was a flicker of happiness. He was glad she hadn’t slept in the bed with Kylo. 

“Just needed a place to...think,” Rey said, walking over to the guest bedroom door and letting herself in. She could tell Kylo was in the shower. Changing hurriedly, before he finished and came out, she fixed her hair into a sloppy ponytail in the mirror of the dresser, and came back out to sit at the table. 

The truth was, she wasn’t equipped for this situation. She had never dealt with family drama or boyfriend drama—apart from that time she found panties in the bed that weren’t hers. She was twenty years old. Fight or flight was telling her to ask Ben for his jeep keys and go for a drive. But that would only delay the inevitable, she needed to make her thoughts known and hope it didn’t tear their family apart.

Ben was watching her from the stove as he flipped some Gardein vegan sausage patties that were making her mouth water. Kylo came out, and, seeing Rey at the kitchen table, he smiled. Maybe he thought she had flown home. He looked like he hadn’t slept. 

He dipped back into the bedroom, coming out a few seconds later with something in his hand, hiding it.

Sitting next to her, Kylo blocked her view of Ben, turning in his seat to talk to her.

“I brought you to Hawaii for a reason. You know what my schedule is like, I don’t have time for vacations. I brought you here to tell you all about me, I wasn’t going to keep it a secret forever,” Kylo said apologetically, holding a little velvet ring box up. 

Rey was already shaking her head no, before he even got to talking about the box. 

“Rey, listen to me, I’m only showing you this because I wanted you to know that I take you seriously and that I was going to propose. I’m not going to do that now, I’ve completely ruined the week. I just wanted to show you,” he said, trying not to cry, setting the box on the table.

She could smell the food burning, Ben was not watching what he was doing.

“I’m too young to get married, Kylo,” Rey said, seriously, not opening the box, “I’ve only been on my own for a couple years.” 

His jaw worked, his tell of embarrassment. Not good.

“Well, a year,” he corrected her, his tone turning cruel, “And then you met me, your meal ticket. That’s what I was, wasn’t I? You just wanted to be famous?” 

Ben threw the spatula down and came striding over.

Rey stood, letting her chair scrape the floor.

“How could you be my meal ticket, when you starve me?” she said, tears coming now.

“Get out of my house!” Ben shouted, pulling Kylo up by the back of his shirt. Kylo turned, landing a punch to Ben’s left cheek, before Ben flung him bodily to the floor.

Ben grabbed his keys off the table, motioning for Rey to head for the Jeep. Watching Kylo slowly stand, Rey took her purse off the coat rack and left him for Ben to deal with. She walked down the steps to the Jeep and climbed in the passenger side, her legs sticking to the vinyl seat cover. She didn’t look to see what was happening in the house, trying so hard not to cry. 

_She lived with Kylo. She was homeless now. How much money was in her bank account? $300, if she was lucky._

Ben came out, letting the screen door slam, shaking his hand as if he had just broken it over Kylo’s face. He climbed in without a word and started the car. Instead of reversing down the driveway, he drove forward, over his lawn, over the sidewalk, onto the road, and headed toward the coast.

Rey felt trapped. Leaning forward, she moved the sun visor to the side, popping a latch that looked like it controlled the cloth hood. Watching her, Ben did the same on his side, also reaching for a lever above the door. Rey found the one above her door and tugged, feeling the top give. Ben pushed it back over their heads without looking. Unbuckling, Rey pulled herself up, letting the wind rip at her hair and skirt. She went further, standing on her seat, holding her hands out to the sides, then straight in the air, ignoring a car that honked as it went by. Breathing in the sea air and the lush jungle, Rey leaned her head back, letting the sun dry her tears. Ben cranked the radio for her.

**Let me out, I’m trapped in a blur  
Started out the way I wanted but it’s weird now  
Let me out, I’m lost in the words  
Too much in my head, I shoulda seen the bad signs  
I wanna tell you everything will be fine  
But I’m afraid that it's a waste of your time  
Let me out, I’m lost in the words  
Don't know how I ended here  
Trapped in a blur**

\----------------------

Ben bought her a new bikini, one with the kind of tops surfers wore, like a high sports bra. Something the ocean couldn’t eat. As a local, Ben pretty much only owned swim trunks, so when they had fled the house, he was already in beach attire.

Neither of them were talking about what had just happened, that was the way they both seemed to prefer it. His knuckles looked like they were bruising. Rey’s bruises were invisible, only hurting on the inside.

Changing in the store’s dressing room, Rey carried her skirt and tank top on one arm, coming out in just her bikini. They were only a block from the beach and everyone else was already walking around in swimwear. 

Ben swallowed, seeing her, daring to look her up and down. His eyes were so young, giving away every thought he had. She smiled for the first time that day.

They walked towards Poipu Beach, the sound of their sandals the only noise. 

The beach was white sand, protected by a small shoal island with a spit of sand and a myriad of tidepools. Under the water, about six feet, were clusters of rocks, so visible beneath the clear water. They swam out to the island, spotting a seal sleeping on the sand, looking like a black discarded buoy. Giving the seal space to sunbathe, Rey made for the tidepools, balancing on the bumpy rocks, just an inch beneath the surface, while she looked for signs of life. Ben motioned for her to come over as he spotted a black sea slug, bigger than her hand, his little eyes peeking up at them from his lava rock.

Rey took Ben’s hand, under the guise of needing help traversing the tide pool rocks. They started walking to the drop off, where the shoal ended and the deep water began. Ben picked her up by the waist and tossed her backwards into the water, jumping after her. They breached the surface at the same time, grinning at each other. 

Ben pulled her closer, by her lower back, until she was straddling him as they floated. He dipped his head down to kiss her, tasting like salt water. They spun in a slow circle, staying afloat as they kissed, then forgot to swim, raising their hands to each other’s bodies. They sank until their mouths were underwater then came back up, laughing. Rey wished she knew if Kylo was gone, they could go back to Ben’s house.

“Are you hungry?” Ben asked, running his hand through his wet hair.

“Yes,” Rey said, smiling.

\----------------------------

Ben took her to a place called EatHealthy Kauai, a white, house-like restaurant with bright blue trim on the doors and windows, a sign on the outside reading ‘Come In, We’re Awesome’. 

The waitress led them to the back, where it opened up into tables on a deck, shaded by giant umbrellas. Chickens meandered freely, but the staff asked that they don’t feed them, since they feed them daily. These chickens were smart, living outside the vegan restaurant.

Rey busied herself with the menu, then ordered the Purple Potato Samosas with Banana Chutney and Ben ordered Blackened Tofu with Sauteed Kale over Rice. 

As they waited, it felt like there were a million things going through her mind. 

_Did Ben want to date her? They had just met--holy shit--two days ago. Did he want to try long distance or did he expect her to stay here? Was this just a summer fling? He wasn’t exactly proposing anything._

She was staring at the flower in the centerpiece, having a mental panic attack. Ben watched her face, his mouth moving as if he was about to speak but kept stopping himself. Finally, he broke the silence, his hand finding her knee under the table.

“Do you like it here?” he asked, seriously.

“The restaurant?” Rey asked, looking around.

“What? No. In Kauai,” he said, smiling.

Her heart gave a little jump for joy. _This is insane._

“I do. Like it here,” Rey smiled back at him. 

Grinning wider, Ben sat back up, as if it were decided. 

_Did I just move to Hawaii?_

\--------------------

After lunch, Ben pulled the Jeep over at a scenic overlook and grabbed a blanket out of the back of the Jeep. He led her down a path to a plateau of grass that was half shaded and they sprawled out on the quilt. 

Rey was so tired after trying to sleep on the floor of the bathroom all night. When she fell asleep, she was on her stomach, using her hands as a pillow. When she woke up, it was getting dark and she was facing Ben’s chest, her head on his arm. She pretended to sleep, enjoying the moment, smelling him, his manly notes of Old Spice and actual sea spray.

He smiled down at her, “Are you sniffing me?”

“Yes, you smell good,” Rey giggled.

“Oh, okay, then, you can sniff away,” he laughed, his chin on her head.

“Ben, do you think Kylo is still at the house?” Rey asked. Maybe he heard Kylo say he was leaving early. Their flights were scheduled for midday tomorrow.

“If he could take a hint, he got a hotel. But just to play it safe, do you want to go to that party I told you about?” Ben asked, propping up on his elbow.

“I look insane. I don’t know, look at my hair,” Rey said, feeling her beach waves.

“I like it like this,” Ben said, defending her hair.

“Well if you smell good, and I look okay, then we should go,” Rey laughed. 

“Yeah?” Ben said, jumping up. He flipped the blanket over her, then rolled her up like a burrito. He lifted her like that, flung her over his shoulder, and carried her, laughing, to the Jeep.


	5. Under the bad, bad moon tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Under the bad, bad moon tonight  
>  Or baby is it just me?  
> Or is it something in the air we breathe?  
> 'Cause I'm feeling dizzy, dizzy**
> 
> Blur - Mixed by MO, Walshy Fire

Ben stopped by a small grocery store to get supplies on their way, filling their bag with things Rey liked. Mini bananas, orange juice for the vodka, dark chocolate. They parked in the grass of the secret beach bonfire. It looked like the worst kept secret on the island. It was only 9 pm and there was already about fifty people. There was a group around a sand volleyball court, watching an 8-person game, and the rest were just lighting the bonfire, made of driftwood. 

Introducing her to his friends, a gay couple, Poe and Finn, and so many other names, Rose, Paige, Beaumont, Jannah. More friends than Kylo had introduced her to in the year that they’d been together. 

Ben pulled a machete up that was stuck in a log like Excalibur and broke open the tops of two coconuts for them from a pile. He dumped the coconut water in a waiting pitcher, then mixed their drinks in the coconuts as the cup.

By the time she was through her second coconut drink, she started to pick up on a little look everyone was giving Ben. As if they were asking him a question with their eyes, a question they didn’t want to voice aloud in front of her. 

_Did they think she looked too young for him? Did they know she was--or used to be--his brother’s girlfriend?_

She couldn’t imagine all of his friends knowing the name of his brother’s girlfriend. 

Ben wasn’t introducing her as his girl, but he presented her to everyone with his hand on the small of her back, which was a subtle way of saying it. 

As it got dark, the volleyballers came over to the bonfire and the exercise became dancing. They had a row of JBL speakers, each synced to Poe’s iphone, their unofficial DJ. 

Irritated with her bathing suit top digging into her neck, Rey undid the polyester tie at the top and retracted her arms into her shirt until she’d worked her way out of it and pulled it out the top. She laid it on a log.

“Alright, _Houdini_ ,” Ben laughed, watching as she pulled her tank top up to show her waist and tied it in a knot.

“Go on, get out there, you guys,” Poe said, putting on a tropical house song.

Rey set down her third drink and Ben pulled her towards the dancers next to the bonfire, spinning her once, then pulling her close. 

**Our hearts are like firestones**

**And when they strike, we feel the love**

**Sparks will fly, they ignite our bones**

**And when they strike, we light up the world**

Rey wasn’t good at many things, but she was pretty good at dancing, especially when she had the energy and wasn’t starving herself. She started off by closing her eyes, letting Ben hug her close, and waiting for the beat to pick up. As the tempo built, she slid lower, letting her butt graze his crotch on the way back up, just barely. Raising her arm until it was behind his neck. Rolling her hips, she kept pace with the song, letting Ben’s hands run over her stomach, feeling him plant a kiss on her neck. 

He was getting _excited_ , probably a bad idea in a men’s bathing suit. He seemed to be thinking the same thing. She pulled him away from the fire, walking in front of him.

They started running to the Jeep. Before he could open the door, Rey turned him around and kissed him, grinding into his erection the way she wanted to do the first time he kissed her against the tree. He moaned into her kiss. 

Rey glanced around. Everyone was at the bonfire and they were blocked from view by the cars. Lowering one hand, she rubbed his length, hard as a rock, and so close beneath the thin, lightweight fabric. 

“Oh, fuck,” he said, surprised by her hand. “Thank you for getting me out of there before all my friends saw me with a boner,” he said, his breath coming faster.

Rey didn’t speak. In her experience, talking tended to ruin the mood. Kneeling down, she untied his shorts, making to pull them down.

“You don’t have to do that, it’ll just go away,” he said quickly, as if she was doing him some kind of favor.

“I want to,” Rey said. She knew how much Kylo liked them, these days it was practically all that would satisfy him. Freeing him from the fabric, she put him in as far as he would go, sucking as she pulled him out. He got even harder, feeling like a steel rod covered in soft skin. Ben made a strangled little noise, and closed his eyes hard, his elbows resting on the hood of the Jeep. 

Rey couldn’t believe how big he was. It made her arm tired just stroking his shaft while she took the rest in her mouth. Swirling her tongue over his tip, he stifled another groan, covering his face with both hands, embarrassed at his own lack of composure. 

_God, you’re cute,_ she thought.

She felt herself growing wet in her bikini bottoms. Too bad _her_ foreplay was going to finish him off. Rey pursed her lips tighter and let the softer, wetter inside of her lips hug him on the way back up.

“Jesus fuck,” he said, somewhere above her. She loved all his feedback, not just from his deep voice as he cursed under his breath, but from his cock throbbing, from his whole body as it tensed.

Bouncing a little now, Rey went faster--lost in “cock worship” as she thought of it, a trance-like carnal state she could enter into--close to coming herself. He was trying to warn her, but she only went faster, feeling his body pump a gush of hot water down her throat. Gagging a little, she swallowed it all, a little impressed with herself. 

_God, she was soaked._

Just as she stood and Ben put himself away, a couple girls walked by, waving, as they headed to their cars. Ben smiled sheepishly, looking at Rey. 

Rey wasn’t smiling, she was struggling, but didn’t know how to tell him what she needed.

“Rey, what’s wrong?” Ben said, worried, “You’re shaking.”

Blushing, Rey tried to stop thinking about how she almost came giving him a blow job. About how swollen and hot she felt down there. It almost hurt, she wanted him so badly.

“You’re not talking, what do you need?” Ben asked, his deep voice driving her even more crazy.

“Okay, I’m sorry if this is like, completely wrong, but you’d kinda look like you just... _really_ need to come,” Ben said, waiting for her to slap him.

“Yeah,” Rey breathed. 

“Okay, what do you want, my mouth or my hand, going to be like ten minutes otherwise,” he laughed, meaning his dick recovery time.

“What do you want to do?” she asked, politely, feeling ridiculous, squirming against his Jeep with need.

Ben came up close, putting his hands on the waistband of her skirt, leaning in until his deep voice was in her ear, “Stop trying to please me and tell me what you want, I’m not my brother.”

“I want your hand,” Rey whispered, gasping as he lifted her up the side of the Jeep by her vagina with his right hand, untying her bathing suit bottoms with the left. He allowed her bottoms to hang, dangling from her right thigh.

Sucking in his breath--as he felt her _dripping_ down there--Ben pressed his fingers roughly up and down her, then tested her entrance with two fingers. Rey bit down on his shoulder, just barely, exhaling loudly, wishing she could make more noise. 

Ben hoisted her up higher so she could wrap her arms around his shoulders. He curled his fingers, digging them into her G-spot, causing her legs to clench around him. Driving in a third finger, he cursed into her neck as she got slicker and slicker, his arm muscles tensing nonstop, as he dug in his huge fingers over and over. Groaning into his shirt, Rey felt her nerves igniting, and her whole body tremble. Her orgasm finally came, and she was able to stay quiet, but she realized she was breathing way too loudly. Ben slid her back down to her feet. 

Rey caught her bikini bottoms before they fell and re-tied them on the side. She felt so much better, like a pressure had been building for three days that was finally released. Her legs were a little wobbly, though, she probably couldn’t go back to dancing just yet. Ben leaned closer, about to say something, one hand on the Jeep.

“Ben?” a female voice called from the front of the parking lot. Ben stood up straight.

Rey giggled, _another close call_ , but stopped when she saw the stern look on Ben’s face.

“Ben?” she called again, coming closer.

“Who is that?” Rey asked, seeing a redhead appear between two cars.

“Rey-,” Ben started, but she was upon them.

“Ben, who is this?” she asked, angrily, looking at Rey. 

Rey’s heart sank. It felt worse than drowning. She suddenly realized why everyone at the bonfire was asking Ben the same question with their eyes. 

Ben had a girlfriend. 

He was no better than Kylo.


	6. All I can think about is coming over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Isn't it strange that every time  
>  I look at your name I'm suddenly high  
> For you to feel the same I would do almost anything  
> I'd give away this, give away that  
> All of my shoes and all of my hats  
> All I need's you and a bit of music  
> 'Cause all I can think about is coming over, coming over**  
>    
> Coming over by Dillon Francis, Kygo, James Hersey

“This is Rey, Rey this is Victoria, I flipped her house this year,” Ben said, uncomfortably.

“Oh, you flipped my house?” Victoria said, sarcastically, “Let me guess, now you’re,” she switched to air quotes, “flipping Rey’s house?”

“No, he’s not. Sorry, I didn’t know,” she said to Victoria, walking back towards the bonfire, feeling like she was being punished for her own behavior. Karma.

She could hear Ben arguing with Victoria but it was drowned out by the music as she got closer to the group. Sitting on a log, she cried silently, wiping her tears discreetly as to not attract attention. 

Poe sat down next to her staring at the bonfire, leaning over to ask, “I’m guessing Victoria found you guys?”

“Yep,” Rey said, wiping her nose.

“You know, Ben is a nice guy, I don’t know so much about Victoria,” he said, glancing at Rey’s wet eyes.

“Yeah, I know how that goes. I used to date Ben’s brother Kylo,” Rey said, leaving out the fact that “used to” meant until last night.

“I know Kylo, we all went to school together. In fact, Victoria used to date Kylo,” he said, remembering. “There aren’t that many people on the island,” he added.

“Can I get a ride, here in a minute? I need to get my stuff from his house. My plane leaves tomorrow at noon,” Rey asked, wiping a tear off her chin.

“Sure, Babygirl, let me go find Finn,” he said, standing and looking around. Rey stood to follow him, but veered towards the beach as she saw Ben loping over to her from the parking lot. 

She made it out of earshot of the group when he caught up to her.

“Rey, I’m sorry I didn’t mention Victoria, things are always starting and stopping with her, she’s not my girlfriend, at least, I don’t want her to be, now that I’ve met you,” he bungled, running a hand through his hair.

“Ben, I hate everything you just said. Poe’s giving me a ride back to your place. I’m going to get my stuff and go, then you can go home in a couple hours and I’ll be gone, okay?” Rey said, not making eye contact.

“Rey, please, I had you, you said you were going to stay,” he said, his mouth moving as he tried to think of what to say to keep her there.

“No,” Rey said, simply, walking back to the bonfire.

\--------------------------

“Thanks for the ride,” Rey said to Poe and Finn as she climbed out of their car where she’d been downing the last of a family-sized bottle of orange juice to sober up. She had asked just for a drop off, since she could afford a Lyft from Ben’s to the airport.

“Easy on our guy,” Finn said out the window, meaning Ben.

Rey shook her head, walking into the beautiful, empty house. She beelined straight to the guest bedroom, ignoring Chewy up on the kitchen counter, just roosting for the night.

It was almost 1 am and her flight didn’t leave until noon. Rey wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight. She was going to have to sit at the airport for hours.

She threw on a new skirt, the other one had sand in the creases. She brushed her teeth and threw her toothbrush in her suitcase. Done packing, she still had probably an hour and a half before Ben was going to come home, by which time she’d be long gone. 

These were her last few hours in Hawaii, she should go take one last look at the beach in the full moon. She slid the glass door open, walking along the path. 

Rey heard _him_ following her--just like the first time--catching up to her right before she reached the beach. Spinning her around, she saw the flash of his white T-shirt and Ben kissed her. She knew she shouldn’t, she was furious with him. But part of her wanted to fight for him. She twisted her hands in his hair and let him in her mouth, feeling his strong arms squeezing her waist. 

He tasted like beer from the party. 

Wait. 

Ben didn’t have beer, he had vodka.

Rey pulled away, just a few inches, to look at his face. 

No stubble.

“Kylo?” she whispered. 

Over his shoulder, she saw a flash of white, Ben on the porch, watching. 

He _had_ come back to catch her before she left. Or maybe to make sure Kylo was gone. 

Ben turned and went back in the house.

Rey pushed Kylo off, noticing he had a black eye forming from his fight with Ben earlier.

“Why are you wearing that?” Rey cried, looking at his white shirt. 

“What?” Kylo said, looking down.

“Ben’s shirt!” Rey said, louder than she intended. He must not have known she had to resort to their colors to distinguish them.

“All my clothes were dirty, I-,” he started, before comprehension blinked into Kylo’s dark eyes. “Did you think I was Ben just now?” Kylo asked coldly, his fists clenching. Not good.

Ben’s voice echoed in her head as she stared up at Kylo. 

_“Stop asking permission.”_

_“Stop apologizing.”_

_“Tell me what you want.”_

“Kylo, I don’t need your permission to date who I want. I’m not going to apologize for falling in love, when you never loved me. I want you to leave, I want you to go back to LA, right now,” she said, forcefully.

His jaw moved, his tell that he wanted to punch something, but he couldn’t beat love into her. After a tense moment, Kylo turned and walked back to the house, skipping the back porch and just walking along the side, to the front yard and the road.

Rey had never spoken the plain truth like that. She felt hungry for more. Marching back into the house, she let herself into Ben’s bedroom. He turned around to look at her, shirtless.

“Oh, sorry, didn’t know you were changing,” Rey said, then backtracked. 

_We’re being honest now._

“I’m not sorry? I like seeing you with your shirt off. And what you just saw, I thought he was you. Also, I do actually prefer no stubble, facial hair is scratchy. But regardless, I liked you. I liked you so much. Until Victoria. So...I’m going to sleep here til 9 am, then I’m leaving,” she finished lamely.

Ben stared at her, unmoving.

She closed the door, walking back to the guest bedroom. Sliding down the door on her back, she put her head between her knees, thinking. _How many more ways could she mess up this vacation?_

In three short days, she had fallen for her brother’s twin, she’d nearly drowned, she found out Kylo was a felon, she refused a proposal, witnessed a fist fight, did whatever that was in the parking lot with Ben, and found out he had a girlfriend. 

Out of everything, it was the girlfriend that upset her the most. _How easy would it have been to just tell her that he had one and then leave her? Why was there overlap?_ She didn’t kiss Ben til her heart knew Kylo was out of the picture, and even then it felt rude. 

Rey stood, pacing now. If Victoria wasn’t his girlfriend anymore, then maybe she could stay. She had kissed him--or so she had thought--just now. 

_“Tell me what you want,”_ Ben’s deep voice replayed in her head. 

_I want to go back to your room, right now,_ she thought. _I want to stay here with you._

Crying now, she stared at the doorknob to her bedroom, raising her hand to twist it, but only managed to squeeze it until her knuckles turned white. She lowered her hand to her side and took a step back.

The door burst open and Ben was kissing her, pushing her back to the dresser. Her heart exploded as she grabbed every inch of him she could find.

No stubble.

“You’re Ben, right?” she asked, watching as he pulled her tank top down until it went below her exposed breasts. 

He _did_ smell like Old Spice and he _was_ still shirtless. 

_Did she have to be a detective every time she wanted to kiss someone on this crazy island?_

“I shaved,” he laughed, his lips on her breasts as he kissed her there too.

“I like it,” Rey muttered as he lifted her ass onto the dresser, pulling her bathing suit bottoms off and letting them fall to the floor.

“Where’s Kylo?” Ben asked, untying his shorts.

“I told him to leave,” Rey said, annoyed by all the talking and shutting him up with a kiss.

Ben pulled her closer to the edge, shaking the dresser. He raised his hand to his mouth, and brought his spit down to his cock, lifting her skirt a little so he could find her entrance. Rey leaned back to make the angle easier, her head on the glass mirror.

An inch at a time, Ben pushed, then retreated, until he had almost his whole cock inside her. Rey knew she was tight, it had been a couple months since her and Kylo had had sex. Apart from her getting him off…

The dresser was shaking too much but Ben didn’t want to pull out. He lifted her up and carried her to the bed, lying her down width-wise and continuing. 

Rey couldn’t help but observe how Ben was different in bed too. Kylo was so mechanical, forceful, like rutting with a giant robotic sex doll. Ben moved in liquid motions, like a swimmer, one movement blending in with the next. He was everywhere at once, neglecting nothing. His big hand on her small breast, kneading it while he kissed the other one, up to her neck, her mouth, his tongue finding hers. 

Rocking her hips to encourage him, Rey marveled at the feel of him inside her, and the emptiness he left behind with every stroke. He was going in all the way now, and she cried out in ecstasy, not having to pretend like she did with Kylo, she was going to come in missionary position--which was a first. Licking his fingers, Ben pressed on her clit, not even rubbing her, just applying an intense pressure. She came, gripping his arms, her back arching as she tried to grind herself into his hand. Ben leaned on his arms, panting.

Indicating she wanted to be on top, Rey pushed on Ben’s arm to flip him on his back. Somehow they ended up sliding off the bed, taking half the covers with them, but Rey could do this from the floor. 

She threw a leg over him, but didn’t position him yet. Sliding back and forth on him, his cock laying flat, long enough to touch his belly button, she pleasured herself, taking what she wanted, making him wait. Ben seemed to be enjoying it, though, his mouth tight and his head falling back, cursing under his breath. He felt so hard and warm on her clit, she knew she could get off like this, but it would take time and she didn’t want him to come on his own stomach.

Lifting his cock, she raised herself up on her knees further than she thought she’d have to, then slid down over him, taking all of him, the angle almost painful. She could feel his tip pushing against her organs. _Holy shit._

Bobbing up and down, she lifted her hair off her neck, throwing her head back, _ah, so much cooler being on top._ Ben gripped her hips, watching her, his face pained. _Same face,_ she thought, remembering Kylo. He was about to come. She moved her hips forward slightly as she bobbed, like a belly dancer and he groaned, relaxing. Rey felt a fresh warmth inside of her as he came.

Rey leaned forward, laying on his chest, leaving him inside her. She didn’t know what to say, she was so tired.

“Thank you for coming,” Rey said, meaning to her room, but whatever, it worked on two levels.

“Thank you for staying,” Ben smiled, catching his breath.


	7. Epilogue: It’s true love, don’t waste it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **It's true love, don't fake it  
>  You better not, you better not  
> It's right here, don't waste it  
> You better not, you better not  
> Don't say you can't figure it out, figure it out  
> I know you can figure it out, figure it out  
> It's true love, don't waste it  
> You better not, you better not**
> 
> Better Not (with Wafia) by Louis The Child

Ben’s hand led Rey through the maze of tables to the dancefloor, and, finding an empty spot, pulled Rey into his arms. They swayed, listening as the breeze muffled the sound of the steel drum in the song. Someone came up, tapping Ben on the shoulder.

An older woman smiled, giving Ben a hug, “We have to go, congratulations, beautiful wedding!”

“Uh, thank you,” Ben said, playing along. She was likely the tenth person to think he was Kylo today. Everyone on Victoria’s side of the family kept confusing the two of them, even though he was clearly with Rey. Maybe they thought she was a cousin or something.

Rey was still amazed that she found herself at Kylo’s beach wedding, only six months after they had broken up. Apparently Victoria was a stewardess and they had reconnected on his flight home. Fate is weird sometimes.

Finn and Poe danced by them, showing them up spectacularly. As they passed, she caught a glimpse of Kylo dancing in the middle with Victoria. He actually looked very happy, kissing her hand as he draped it over his shoulder.

An old man she assumed was from Victoria’s side started walking towards Ben, no doubt to offer him congratulations and say his farewells.

“Want to get out of here?” Ben asked, laughing.

“Beach or parking lot?” Rey asked, two very different scenarios lay before him.

“Tell me what you want,” he whispered in her ear.

“Parking lot, then beach,” she laughed, pulling him behind her.

[ ](https://ibb.co/ZY8cKjp)


End file.
